I think this can be both exhilirating and devastating…exhilirating when it works and devastating when it does not.
I want to share an example- I recently cared for a beautiful boy who had a high-risk leukaemia. He relapsed soon after completing treatment, and suffered from extreme pain and weakness. He was 10 years old, and exceptionally bright- he was so respectful.
Our team had various sessions with his family- mother, father and maternal aunt. They refused to disclose the relapse- they thought that he would lose hope. His mom eventually agreed to speak to him álone,”when I am ready”… I doubt this ever happened. I had grown to love this boy. It was hard to see him, looking at me with “knowing” eyes, but not being able to speak to him openly. It was sad. He mother shared that he had read messages on her phone about him relapsing, and that he had heard the family speaking about it openly- but no-one spoke to him. This deeply saddened me.
I think it would be of great benefit to the patient (and family) if the Health care team could gain more knowledge about different cultures- it could go a long way in gaining respect and trust.
Ideally, if everyone can make the patient the centre of the discussion/consideration that would probably have the best outcome? (But circumstances are not always ideal- as illustrated in the example above). Can I just add that his family was exceptionally close- they loved and cared for this boy so much. Grief is just so unpredictable.
