I find discontinuing feeds at the end of life to be very challenging. For most parents and caregivers, feeding a child is an act of love and care. I have found it difficult to get parents to understand and agree on discontinuing feeds in the active dying process. I have experienced that caregivers feel as though they are starving their child and that a little bit of yogurt or porridge will do no harm. It is in the moment that I have had to re-explain the risks and suffering caused to the child when force-fed food or when NGT feeds are continued. It usually takes parents some time to accept this and understand that their child is not hungry and that their comfort is more important at this stage. I have found it useful to help parents find other ways to engage in activities that make them feel as though they are caring for and loving their child. Such as, brushing their hair, stroking their body, putting their favourite clothing on, putting lotion on their body, washing them, changing their nappy, mouthcare etc. All these acts allow the child to feel loved and cared for.
